5 Ways to Feel More Self-Confident

By: Christina Vo

Graphics from @recipesforselflove

I’m not good enough. I can’t do this. I’m just not worthy. These negative self-talks can cloud our judgement when it comes to realizing who we really are. It’s that voice inside our head always criticizing us and trying to knock us down from greatness. We are our own harshest critics, but it’s about time we stop succumbing to negativity and the idea of perfection. Instead, we need to learn to embrace our flaws, believe in our skills and abilities, and love ourselves from head to toe, because we know we are good enough, that we can do this, and most importantly, that we are worthy.

Here are 5 lifestyle changes you can implement to feel more self-confident!


“Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.” - Suzy Kassem

Let’s be honest, it’s so easy to believe the worst of ourselves and to compare ourselves to others, but what good is that going to do for us? That is negativity taking over and trying to brainwash us into believing that we are imperfect. We need to fight back, practice self-compassion, think and act more positively, and say to ourselves, “I can do whatever I can set my mind to!”

This can mean reminding ourselves of our favorite traits, surrounding ourselves with supportive peers, or it might even take yelling at ourselves in the mirror that we are badass! We are strong, smart, beautiful, courageous, and powerful individuals, and we know better than to let negativity ruin what is positive in our lives.

According to the Mayo Clinic, looking at yourself in a more positive light will help raise self esteem. 



“The most important relationship is the one you have with yourself ”
- Diane Von Furstenberg

If you are neglecting your body, how can you fully thrive? It’s essential to take care of your body, mind, and soul everyday, and not just when you’re sick. Practicing healthy habits, like reducing stress in your life, exercising regularly, taking breaks, and eating right. These are all steps in the right direction for a healthier and more resilient life. Most of us can be crazy busy and even feel guilty when we take time to care for ourselves, but realize that self-care is essential to a happier and more positive life!

A 2016 Neuropsychiatric Disease and Treatment study found that regular physical activity improved participants' body image, and thus improved their self-confidence.



“You, yourself as much as anybody in the entire universe deserves your love and affection!” - Buddha 

Loving yourself can be easier said than done, but it’s a journey worth taking and a necessary priority in your life! Self-love is appreciation for yourself and flourishes from actions that support your wellbeing, both physically and psychologically. When we practice self-love, we start having more compassion for ourselves, accepting our weaknesses and strengths, being more motivated for our life and goals, and feeling comfortable in our own bodies. 

According to Joyce Marter, psychotherapist & founder of Urban Balance, “This is because when we love ourselves we know that we can give without becoming resentful, exhausted and depleted, and we can receive because we know we deserve it. Self-love is the prerequisite for complete immersion in the abundant flow of light and love in the world around us.”



Challenge yourself to act upon your competence and to use your skills and abilities to dive deeper into a passion of yours! Start by setting small goals and building yourself up to harder goals, while making sure you make a list of your achievements. As you push yourself to try new things, whether that be writing more, taking cooking classes, starting a business, or volunteering, you’ll understand how failures and mistakes can actually lead to growth and success. 

Bernice Milburn Moore, writer of “Self-Confidence for Competence” in the Journal of Educational Leadership, says, “Self-confidence without competence is of as little is competence without self-confidence.” 



“Visualize your highest self, then start showing up as her/him/them”
- Anonymous

Visualizing your highest self achieving all your goals is the first step to becoming that person! Constantly comparing yourself to others only leads to having a negative perception of yourself that is often inaccurate. Visualizing yourself as someone who you are proud of will motivate you to strive for bigger things and go after what you want.

“People who have higher self-esteem and self-worth usually have higher levels of confidence, so when you visualize yourself in that situation, focus on that you as a friend, someone you would like to help and encourage. Allow you to begin to appreciate all of the amazing qualities of you,” Moira Hutchison, a Mindfulness Coach & Teacher, Energy Healer, Author, and Speaker, states.